written
and rewritten over and over and over You take out those razor blades,
and cut for the very last time. You grab that bottle of pills and take
them all. Laying down, holding the letter to your chest, you close your
eyes for the very last time. A few hours later, your little brother
knocks on your door to come tell you dinners ready. You don’t answer, so
he walks in. All he sees is you laying on your bed, so he thinks you’re
asleep. He tells your mom this. Your mom goes to your room to wake you
up. She notices something is odd. She grabs the paper in your hand and
reads it. Sobbing, she tries to wake you up. She’s screaming your name.
Your brother, so confused, runs to go tell Dad that “Mommy is crying and
sissy won’t wake up.” Your dad runs to your room. He looks at your mom,
crying, holding the letter to her chest, sitting next to your lifeless
body. It hits him, what’s going on, and he screams. He screams and
throws something at the wall. And then, falling to his knees, he starts
to cry. Your mom crawls over to him, and they sit there, holding each
other, crying. The next day at school, there’s an announcement. The
principal tells everyone about your suicide. It takes a few seconds for
it to sink in, and once it does, everyone goes silent. Everyone blames
themselves. Your teachers think they were too hard on you. Those mean
popular girls, they think of all the things they’ve said to you. That
boy that used to tease you and call you names, he can’t help but hate
himself for never telling you how beautiful you really are. Your ex
boyfriend, the one that you told everything to, that broke up with you..
He can’t handle it. He breaks down and starts crying, and runs out of
the school. Your friends? They’re sobbing too, wondering how they could
never see that anything was wrong, wishing they could have helped you
before it was too late. And your best friend? She’s in shock. She can’t
believe it. She knew what you were going through, but she never thought
it would get that bad… Bad enough for you to end it. She can’t cry, she
can’t feel anything. She stands up, walks out of the classroom, and just
sinks to the floor. Shaking, screaming, but no tears coming out. It’s a
few days later, at your funeral. The whole town came. Everyone knew
you, that girl with the bright smile and bubbly personality. The one
that was always there for them, the shoulder to cry on. Lots of people
talk about all the good memories they had with you, there were a lot.
Everyone’s crying, your little brother still doesn’t know you killed
yourself, he’s too young. Your parents just said you died. It hurts him,
a lot. You were his big sister, you were supposed to always be there
for him. Your best friend, she stays strong through the entire service,
but as soon as they start lowering your casket into the ground, she just
loses it. She cries and cries and doesn’t stop for days. It’s two years
later. The whole school talks to a counselor/therapist at least once a
week. Your teachers all quit their job. Those mean girls have eating
disorders now. That boy that used to tease you cuts himself. Your ex
boyfriend doesn’t know how to love anymore and just sleeps around with
girls. Your friends all go into depression. Your best friend? She tried
to kill herself. She didn’t succeed like you did, but she tried… your
brother? He finally found out the truth about your death. He self harms,
he cries at night, he does exactly what you did for years leading up to
your suicide. Your parents? Their marriage fell apart. Your dad became a
workaholic to distract himself from your death. Your mom got diagnosed
with depression and just lays in bed all day. People care. You may not
think so, but they do. Your choices don’t just effect you. They effect
everyone. Don’t end your life, you have so much to live for. Things
can’t get better if you give up. I’m here for absolutely anyone that
needs to talk, no matter who you are. Even if we’ve NEVER talked before,
I’m here for you. Copy and paste this as your status to show people
there are people out there that care.
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